I am posting a little late tonight because my computer is running so slow, some day I will have to break down and buy a new one! I wanted to take the time to thank everyone who has been visiting my blog. Today my sitemeter shows my page views have increased by almost double!!
I really enjoy doing this and although I talk alot about my family and our situations, I really want to reach out to people who may be going through the same, and know they are not alone. I am always trying to think of on new things to add and thinking of what you may like to view on my blog. If you have any suggestions feel free to send me a comment. I was thinking of adding a section to share some cooking recipes. My sister and I are always looking for something new, and with summer on the way I thought that would be good to add. I may add a link to listen to new music when I learn how to. I want to share some more inspirational and compassionate stories with everyone as well. With everyone going through these hard times, financially or emotionally we can all us some daily inspiration and compassion. I felt compassion today from watching Barbra Walters on Oprah. She shared something very painful to her, that I could definitely relate too. She grew up with a member of her family that had a disability. It was her sister who was retarded. I also grew up the same way with my mother being disabled by mental illness. She shared the same feelings that I had, you loved them, but did not bring friends by the house, Often times you would say to yourself, this is too tough, I can't deal with it anymore. Often times I would go to stores with my mom and as I matured when people were rude to her or gave her weird looks, I always stood up for her. I knew from an early age that people do not understand mental illness or retardation, which made me even more angry, if they had cancer would they have treated them the same way? No they would not have, because cancer was ok to talk about and understand. I still see it now, I work with the disabled and I still see the same discrimination. I hope someday I can do something to change that. In the end though my mother got much better for the last 20 years of her life and we had alot of good times, and in her dying days we had alot of very intimate moments of love. Barbra said how she regrets not being there for her sister when she passed because she had to make a speech and her sister died alone. She cannot talk about it without crying. I feel the same, I should have stayed with my mom, but I thought she would have held out through the night, and I had car troubles, so I had to leave the nursing home with my brother at 10.00pm. She passed away two and a half hours later by herself. But I also have peace in the fact that many people say to me that it is cause she did not want you to be there. We were told that day at 9.30am that Friday morning she only had a couple of hours left, yet she held on for 15 more hours. My mom slipped away quietly in the middle of the night. Even in her darkest day, she remained dignified. She did not want anyone to see her suffer or feel sorry for her. Thanks again for all your viewing. I hope you all have a good day,